If you spend five minutes in a Veterans’ forum, you will for sure learn and discover a lot of things about the military. Discovering bizarre, odd, or strange tactics or strategies is already a given. The thing is, they are also creative in many ways.

Creative in a way that when troops mess up in tiny bits, leaders often fix it with humor, or oddly specific “lessons.” Nope, we’re not talking about hazing or humiliation.

We’re talking about flipping the rocks, chasing the mythical supply item, or even reciting the standards until they stick, kind of things. And because they are hilarious, they become a unit's unique story that even the internet can’t stop retelling.

These stories of funny military punishments survive precisely as they are taught without scarring, and because, many years later, they are still funny.

Creative Punishments in Military Units

Browse any forum thread about funny discipline, and you’ll see these funny military punishments: “Flip the rocks so the other color shows,” “mop the rain off the motor pool,” or “carry this item everywhere for a week so you never forget it again.”

For example, “flip the rocks so the other color shows,” is where each is painted with a color on one side, and another color on the other. Whoever gets the unfortunate task of painting the rocks gives future disobedient soldiers a lighter punishment.

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Yep, they are all hilarious. And, these little chores keep the service members busy even when leaders just want to make a point and create memes that the next troops will inherit. It’s the kind of punishment that is harmless, works, and corrects the behavior while giving everyone a laugh.

These punishments in the military are remembered in many memories, and they might be different in each unit, but the task ties back to the minimal mistake.

Grid Square Hunts: Military Humor Tradition

Then there’s the legendary new guy quest. A new young private gets sent to supply for a “box of grid squares,” “chem-light batteries,” or an “exhaust sample,” until you realize it’s just a joke.

Why a joke, you ask? Well, those are just imaginary items to play around with the new guy. They are basically giving the new guy a taste of military humor.

So now the new guy comes back to you, telling you there’s no box of grid squares or chem-light batteries, you laugh, and just see how gullible they are.

It’s the kind of punishment that is perfect for the newcomer, and no, they are not strict; they are more like harmless rites of passage or corrective nudges for someone who didn’t pay attention in class.

Ghost Soldier Punishment: Silence in Ranks

One of the internet’s favorites is the command, “you’re a ghost now, so you can’t talk.”

One servicemember failed to notice the drill instructor coming on the deck. When these things happen, what do service members normally do? They immediately salute and report to their post.

As for him, he wasn’t able to do that. So the drill instructor ran up to the rifle rack, smacked him, and yelled, “BAM! You’re dead!”

Your initial reaction would be trying to respond, so that’s what he did. But when he tried doing so, he was cut off by the drill instructor and said, “You’re a ghost now, you can’t talk. Go act like a ghost.”

So he walked and wandered for the rest of his two-hour firewatch, acting like a ghost, and proudly took the responsibility with “ooOOooo I’m a ghoOsOost” noises until their senior drill instructor got pissed.

You see, punishments in the military are not too bad, especially this one.

Teapot Song Punishment: Military Tradition

One service member from the internet had an intimidating and strict sergeant as a team leader. He definitely knew how to discipline service members if they stepped out of line. Luckily for him, he knows what’s right and wrong. But the motor transport operator (MTO) did not.

This MTO always had an excuse for everything, and nothing was ever his fault. He was trying to pass the blame to the service member because the driver outranked him. Thankfully, the sergeant knows what’s up and corrected him.

One day, during a convoy security mission in southern Iraq, the MTO hit a pot hole. The sergeant flips out. And blamed the service member for his faulty judgment.

The sergeant made the MTO open the door and show every guard that he was sitting on an empty .50 caliber can and made him sing “I'm a little teapot, me oh my; I sit on a high chair so we don't blow up and die,” and became the laughing stock of their battalion for months.

Unique Military Punishments: Noteworthy Examples

Below are some additional noteworthy mentions that will make you chuckle.

The Eagle Scout

A recruit in Marine Corps boot camp bragged that he was an eagle scout. During Physical Training, his Drill Instructor took him into the woods and made him build a next. He then had to squat over the nest in order to keep his eggs warm.

Tree Hugger

On older, but still quite popular punishment is the act of making a private hug a tree. This punishment often gets mixed responses from service members, with some laughing at the humorous task, and others finding the act embarrassing.

Sweeping Sunshine

Last, but certainly not least on our list is the "sweeping sunshine" punishment. The story goes that a private was made to sweep sunshine off the sidewalks. Lets just say that it took him all day.

These funny military punishments indeed share a few traits: they teach a lesson, they are harmless, and they give a little dash of humor. It’s simply a reminder of how commanding discipline can be effective without taking itself too seriously. They’re not strict, but for sure will leave a lasting memory, and when you remember it, you’ll always have a good laugh.

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• Burnout After the Barracks: Why So Many Veterans Take the Wrong Job the First Time
• The Ultimate Guide: 50 Best Benefits for Veterans Across Our 50 States
• Call of Duty, IRL: Veterans Leading in Esports and Gaming Communities

Sources:

• 9 Entertaining Ways to Discipline Your Troops
• Military Slang Dictionary
• Here Are The Funniest Punishments Ever Handed Down in the Military, According to the Internet
• Best Punishment You've Seen Handed Down by a Superior